"How much should I tip my housekeeper?" My husband says we should tip as little as possible. . .

By Quentin Fottrell

"I think we should tip people 30% if they bother coming to our house."

Dear Quentin,

I am a mother of one child and have a busy job. How much should I tip my cleaning lady? My husband says we shouldn't tip that much, probably around 10-15%, because we use an app and we don't always have the same lady.

It also doesn't do deep cleaning and uses all of our stuff like our mops and cleaning liquids. I think we should tip people 30% if they bother coming to our house. Also, I want to tip in person with cash, not through the app.

I want her to feel like the money is coming from me. Even if you continue to work for us, I want you to enjoy coming to us and do a good job. My husband says we should go the most efficient route and tip the app as little as possible.

What is right?

big tipper

Dear BigBenne,

It takes a lot of trust when you invite someone into your home on a regular basis, especially when they have the keys and access to your most personal belongings. Because of this, you should choose a housekeeper that you like and who does a good job.

It's a good idea to stay with one person as you will develop a relationship with them over time. They will become familiar with you and your family and your routines. You also have more flexibility and relationships if you hire the same person every week.

In my opinion, you should tip your housekeeper at least 20% every week. So if you pay him $100, tip him $20. Or tip him at least three weeks' wages at the end of the year. If you tip him every week, you're buying him a personalized Christmas present.

But of course, if you think 30% is fair, that's generous, and there's no right or wrong answer. There is no rule book. Everyone does things differently. (Emily Post suggests a small gift or a week's wages as a New Year's tip. That seems too modest to me.)

This commitment is also accompanied by a declaration of goodwill. People want to be paid fairly, they want to be valued and they want to be seen. If she makes the effort to clean up after you every week, you should make the effort to meet her.

As you build a relationship and a safe space for conversation, there's never a bad time to take things beyond the transactional. Ask him questions about his family and history. She will likely learn a lot and give him a newfound respect and admiration for her.

I was invited for two months at the beginning of the pandemic. I was usually at home when the housekeeper came, and I learned a lot about Georgia, the former Soviet republic, and the years of poverty and political instability that followed the dissolution of the Soviet Union.

She said that in the 1990s, when Georgia became an independent state again, they had a very unreliable electricity supply. His children, he said, are "the lost generation." His young son once came home with a machine gun abandoned by Russian forces.

He gave me his Georgian name and showed me FaceTime videos of his family at home. He had never met his grandchildren and was saving money to build a house in Georgia for his extended family and to return there one day.

Too often janitors and office cleaning staff are overlooked. You arrive after most people have gone home and work in peace. Being late for work is a gift, a privilege and an opportunity to meet the night staff.

So I'm with you: tip generously, pack supplies (they're heavy to carry), and stay with a housekeeper you can count on for consistent work. And recommend it to friends. Word of mouth is powerful, and as any freelancer will tell you, every detail counts.

Join the private Moneyist group on Facebook, where we seek answers to life's toughest money problems. Readers write to me with all sorts of dilemmas. Ask your questions, let me know what you want to know more about, or check out the latest Moneyist columns.

The Moneyist regrets that it cannot answer the questions individually.

By submitting your questions via email, you consent to them being posted anonymously on MarketWatch. By submitting your story to Dow Jones & Co., the publishers of MarketWatch, you understand and agree that we may use your story or versions of it in any media and platform, including through third parties.

Also read:

What Alice Would Win Today With 'The Brady Bunch'

Is that the most outrageous tip request you've ever heard? "I looked at the seller with a confused expression"

Last month I was not feeling well and I asked my housekeeper to stay at home. I'm afraid it will come back. He called for "unpaid wages". Do I have to do this?

-Quentin Fottrell

(ENDS) Dow Jones Newswire

10/22/22 1718ET

Copyright (c) 2022 Dow Jones & Company, Inc.

Try Adblock (Why?)